It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else's eyes. ~Sally Field
Most of you already know that.
I don't really tend to talk about it much. Mostly because I completely forget it is there. I typically am reminded that it is there when people ask about what we are planning on doing about it or I see a little girl or boy walk up to Lily and ask her what is on her face. Lily responds to the inquiries by stating it's a chocolate birthmark. The kid usually looks at her and says ok and they go about their business. I asked Lily if it bothers her when people ask about it and she just tells me that it's just annoying. (Got to love she even knows what the word annoying is....10yr old older brothers...gotta love them) I explained to her that the person asking probably doesn't know what birthmarks are and were just curious.
I can understand everyone's curiosity but, adults pushing their ideas that we should "do" something about her face...not so much. It is actually really RUDE. I don't mind people asking questions, what bothers me is when people tell me that I have to fix it. WHY? Does it bother you that much?
Don't get me wrong. As her parents, her father & I are concerned about her self esteem as she gets older. There is hair on her birthmark and we am waiting for that 1st kid to make fun of the hair on her face. I know it is inevitable, kids can be cruel and mean.
Over the last 4yrs we have taken Lily to see 2 dermatologists and a few weeks ago we took Lily to see a plastic surgeon. Jeff & I just wanted to see what he had to say and our options. Turns out that we can not have the hair removed or the mark lighten it at all. We would have to have the whole birthmark removed, which would mean they would surgically remove the top layer of skin and the layer underneath it where the hair follicles are. Long story short, she would have 2 surgeries and we would be trading a birthmark for a scar. Not a huge scar & it would be in the natural contour of her smile, but a scar non the less. Right now the surgery is not right for Lily, she has expressed that she likes her birthmark and does NOT want it gone. As for the hair, we were told we can shave it. She does NOT want to shave the hair either. Personally I would like her to let us shave it, but we are respecting her feelings.
She is happy just the way she is.
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