My son was born 5 weeks early 8 years ago. Ian knew he needed to be here. He knew that if he got much bigger in my belly he might not have made it. After I gave birth we found out there not 1, but 2 true KNOTS in the umbilical cord. We were very lucky parents. He was 6lbs 8oz. They let me see & hold him briefly after he was born, but then whisked him away to the NICU. I must say this now, he never had a problem breathing, never needed any meds and was the largest baby in the NICU. But to be on the safe side they wanted to monitor him. I was good with that...until the nightmare began...
(just a warning, I try and keep my blog light and airy...but I also feel the need to share the story behind these photos and how they make me feel.)
(just a warning, I try and keep my blog light and airy...but I also feel the need to share the story behind these photos and how they make me feel.)
First off they never gave me, my family or my son's pediatrician a straight answer on why he was in the NICU or how long we could expect him to be there. Typically a Dr. from the pediatrician's office you choose comes into the hospital in the morning after you give birth. Well, mine never came because he was never called...yes I gave them all the info and they lied and told me they called him when they did not. A nurse (who also takes her children to his office) called his office after I inquired about it. When the pediatrician came to see me, he asked me what was wrong with Ian because there was nothing in his chart and after looking at him he could not find anything wrong. So for 10 days we trekked to the hospital to see Ian. They kept telling us he was having apnea and bradycardia spells. These spells never lasted, never needed intervention, nor did they happen often, nor did I or my family ever witness one. And yes, I was there alot! Not sure if you can see, but there is a tube in my son's nose in a few of the above photos. It was a feeding tube. They said he was eating to slowly (they were timing him) and was tiring himself out. Um....I have had 2 babies and have watched MANY more. I had seen quick eaters, slow eaters and frequent eaters. My son happened to be a slow eater when it came to bottles (I pumped and brought in milk...I happened to have tons of milk). Yep, could have feed 8 babies...found out that from a lactation consultant in the pediatricians office weeks later. Ok, didn't mind the tube so much...but what bothered me is that when I fed him they then pulled the contents up through that tube, measured it and then pushed it back into his tummy. I am not going to go into details about the nurses. There were a couple there that should not be able to speak to people. I do understand that they see mainly really sick babies, they should really learn how to talk to people especially new parents. I am also not going to share my experience with breastfeeding and how they (ppl at the hospital) were not very supportive.
In order to take our son home, my husband, myself and my son had to spend the night in the hospital in a room that looked like a hotel room. My son would be coming home on a breathing monitor that he would stay on 24/7 for at least a month. My mother & I met with the breathing monitor company's rep and they showed us how to put on the monitor. We then watched as they placed the monitor on my son 24 hours before he left the hospital. It would have been fine if they would have put the leads on correctly. They put them on across from each other instead of staggered. NO ONE noticed that it was on INCORRECT. My son was seen by more than one DR. and lots of nurses within that 24hr period. So what happens when you put the leads across from each other?...TONS of false spells!! The first few nights at home with my son were a nightmare. The machine went off all the time and I thought there was really something drastically wrong with my child. I got no sleep and my son got no sleep because I kept waking him up when it would go off. I turned into a fruit cake, thinking my son was going to die. A rep from the monitor company came out and took one look at the leads and knew what was wrong. Within a few days of that, no spells, talking to my pediatrician and a lactation consultant...I called the monitor company and told them to come and pick up the monitor. There was no way I was going to pay money (it was alot, too) to have them read that damn thing....especially after the rep told me the information on it was useless. While I can understand erring on the side of caution...what happened in this hospital was totally uncalled for and left a bad taste in my mouth. Also, I picked my OBGYN because I wanted to deliver my child at that hospital and I also had 2 previous surgeries at that hospital. While I LOVED my OB, she did not deliver anywhere but there. So when I got pregnant with my daughter I found a new OBGYN and gave birth at a different hospital, which was a much better experience.
In the past 8 years my son has meet all of his milestones and has never had any sign of being a preemie. We have joked since then that "I just cook them faster than other people." My daughter was 3 weeks and 1 day early and weighed 7lb 4oz.
If you are still reading, thank you for stopping by this installment of Take Me Back Tuesday. I promise next week will be lighter. =P
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15 Sweet Comments:
(((Hugs))) That must have been scary for you.
We had a bad/unnecessary NICU experience with our youngest, I've thought about writing about it, but I still get so angry anytime I think about it. She is a perfectly healthy 2 yr old. If we are blessed again we will be looking for new Dr's.
What a disturbing story... I know that my faith in hospital staffs have changed in the past few years. I used to think they had our best interests in mind but I no longer feel that way. I used to trust but now I question. I am so glad that your babies are both healthy despite others actions - a mommy knows and you did what was needed.
I am sorry linky wasn't up - I have added your link.
Oh my goodness... what an ordeal!
I hear things like that a lot - hospital staff that make errors and then go far the other way to correct them, rude staff, neglect.
I just don't understand why a person would go into the medical field if they weren't there to be compassionate and help people.
Glad to hear your experience during your daughter's birth was more pleasant!
Love the photos - what a cutie!
That is incredible! I am amazed at what all you all went through. Thank God he has done so well!
Argh! So happy that you have a healthy, regular boy now but what an experience to go through!
My daughter was 6lb8oz about 4 weeks early and I had a rough pregnancy leading up to her birth. For a preemie, she was robust - didn't need help breathing but had a poor sucking reflex (we dripped formula into her) and lacked a few other full term baby reflexes. Between that and my rough delivery, we earned a few extra days in maternity.
The hospital and staff, though busy and rushed, was all pleasant and helpful. We were lucky.
What a scary story. I've learned in my old age (and after my own medical disaster stories) to ALWAYS trust your own judgment. If it doesn't feel right, it probably isn't. Also as mom's, we are at times our children's voice and it so important to not be afraid to speak up when we feel the need.
Wow! Your story has just completely shocked me! I can't believe they hooked up the monitor incorrectly and no one noticed!! I also can't believe they were so unfriendly about breastfeeding.
I am very sorry to hear about your bad experience and so glad it turned out so well, with such a helathy little boy!
Thanks for sharing your story, I am sure it was painful to write!
(((Hugs)))
That is an incredible story, and not in a good way. I hope you filed some sort of complaint as a comedy of errors of that magnitude should have been brought to someone's attention. Ian is beautiful, though, but you know that.
Good night! I don't understand how people can work in a NICU and not have empathy (oh yeah, and brains). I volunteered as a pre-med student at UVA's NICU for two years and saw a lot. Mostly the nurses were great -- it was the doctors who were hustling in and out and it was all so mechanical -- but at least not when the parents were there.
I just kept thinking "law suit, law suit, law suit" as I read..... So glad it had a happy ending.
Wow, what a story!
My first was term, but she also went to the NICU. It was quite the tumultuous event, so I understand a bit of where you;re coming from!
Melanie, that's a horrific story. My daughter was only two weeks early and they put her in NICU for no good reason and told me I had to go home. I told them I'd sleep in the hallway of the NICU if I had to, but that I wasn't leaving without her. They were worried she might have jaundice. She was showing no signs or symptoms--none whatsoever--but they were being "safe" since her bilirubin count was higher than usual.
Anyway, while our experience wasn't nearly as devastating as yours, I empathize and am so sorry to hear about what you endured. Makes me a little nauseated, actually. I'm not happy with what I see happening with so many babies in hospitals and it's painful to keep hearing stories like this and consider what the separation during those vital first few days does to families. Our 3rd baby, as you probably know, was a home birth after two cesareans. SUCH a different experience for our family.
Hugs to you,
~2Shaye
I'm so sorry you had to go through this. I had some trauma with my 1st baby too - It was a terrible experience, and thankfully I had a better time the 2nd go around to replace that experience. Glad he's done so well!
What a terrible time for you. It should have been joyous and that hospital and staff robbed you of that.
I am glad he is fine and doing well.
I had some not so great experiences when I was pregnant with my daughter, too. I don't know why the medical field can be this way at times.
Ruth
That really makes me wonder if your baby wouldn't have been fine if they'd simply given him to you and let you go home with him. Sometimes I think medical professionals just can't accept that there's nothing wrong.
Wow, what a story. I know that had to be terrifying. Glad he came through everything okay even when they did all of those things to him. I can kind of relate. My second child (my son who's now 6) was six weeks early and, like your son, didn't have anything wrong with him. He just wanted to get here - quick, fast and in a hurry. He had been trying since four month inutero. They whisked him off and monitored his breathing, etc., and the only thing they wanted to make sure was that he was holding food down. I was disappointed not to start breastfeeding right away and wonder now had I insisted would he have had to go through that horror of pulling it back up. I'd never heard that before. He was 4 lbs 16 ounces and has mostly met all milestones with a few minor glitches. I sometimes have to remind myself he was a "preemie."
I've had two preemie's and two full term. Thanks for sharing your story and, again, happy birthday to your son. He sure is a handsome young man and I loved the facts you shared in the birthday post about him.
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